Ryan Cassata - "Daughter"
Ryan Cassata is a musician, actor, writer and LGBTQ activist who is changing the game. Ryan became an activist after coming out as trans as a teen. He uses his platform to fight for equality and elevate stories that are often unseen in mainstream culture. TomboyX is the proud sponsor of his new music video, "Daughter".
What is the inspiration behind your song “Daughter”?
The inspiration behind "Daughter" is my true story of coming out and going on TV. When I came out to my dad he was cool for the first week or two and then he realized it wasn't a phase and became really uncool with it. He was very distant in my life at that point, not calling me any name at all. I felt invisible to him. We didn't have a relationship and it was a really rough time because I was a teenager and I felt like I needed my dad's support to thrive.
How has your relationship with your Dad changed and grown in the 10 years since you came out?
It took my dad about 4 years to really come to terms with it. I remember when I was a teenager the song "Butterfly Kisses" (a classic father/daughter song) came on at a party we were both at. We looked at each other and started crying. I finally understood him. He felt like he had lost his "Daughter" and everything he envisioned for me like walking me down the aisle at my future wedding.
I wrote this song to tell him that his "Daughter" is still here. Yeah, his daughter goes by "he" and "Ryan" and is more comfortable being called his "son" but there's still part of me that's his "daughter," because really, for me, "daughter" and "son" mean the same thing if I am being loved and accepted, and I truly feel that I am.
I think he finally realized that I'm still the same person. He calls me his "son" and calls me "Ryan" and my preferred pronouns now, but I think that I'll still always have a father/daughter relationship with him. I don't mind that either. It doesn't bother me anymore. I know he accepts me and I accept him too. If I ever get married my dad can still walk me down the aisle, and I'm sure I'll be wearing a nice tux. It would be an honor to me.
Our relationship grew a lot. My dad is one of the closest people in my life today. I call him every single day.
You used a diverse cast and crew for this video. Tell me a little more about that and why it was important to you.
I put out a post on Instagram looking for people to be in the music video and to film. The cast and crew were all diverse whether they were POC, LGBTQ, or other oppressed groups or allies or family members of actors. Honestly, I just picked the most qualified people for the job.
The lead actors playing my dad and I were Greg and X. Greg is X's dad in real life too and X is trans! It was important for me to have my dad and I portrayed by people that went through what me and my dad went through.
Who are your top influences?
My top inspirations range quite a bit. I really look up to Bruce Springsteen and Taylor Swift as far as songwriting goes and being able to tell a story. I'm also deeply influenced by Classic Rock, Punk, and Pop. I really like a lot of different types of music. I am very influenced by the Beat Generation writers as well.
What other projects are you working on?
Currently, I'm working on my memoir which is almost complete. I'm also recording more music, hopefully an album. We've done some emo hip-hop songs recently. I have a lot of projects happening at once so hopefully I can release more music sometime in the near future.
Is there anything else you want people to know?
I want people to know that this song is my story. It may coincidentally be their story too, however, I am only speaking from my own experiences with my dad. I hope this song helps people who have been in similar situations. If not, I hope that people will realize that all trans people are different and have different experiences. Love each other!
If you want to see more from Ryan you can follow him on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter. You can find this video and more on his YouTube channel.